Saturday, December 10, 2011


So I'm sitting here, not being able to get to sleep, thinking over what I did today. It's frustrating to have this happen on a Saturday night, because more than likely it means I will not wake in time to go to church, since it starts at 9:30. There have been many, many times over the past months when I actually could have gone, if the services started at the usual hour of 11AM, but that's not how it works here. sigh.

This morning I worked on our financial records, bringing them up to date while John went outside, picked up his chain saw, and went a little overboard. Suddenly the white pines, which had sweeping boughs which brushed the ground, are now trimmed and look very neat. I somehow miss the other though, but I am sure I will get used to it. The pines are on the property line with our neighbor and I only hope that she sees it in a positive light. We went to the nearby Mexican restaurant for lunch and then to CVS and then to a local greenhouse to pick out some poinsettias to give to our neighbors. After that, I was completely out of energy and achy with fibro pain.

I received notice that some postcards I sent to different people in Russia were big hits with them. It always makes me happy to know that a little bit of extra time taken to see what kinds of cards they like pays off. I like people to be happy!

Our local church had their big Christmas dinner tonight. I've never been able to go. In fact, I have not been able to attend a single event or gathering they have had. It's hard sometimes, you feel so isolated, and although we know that most people just don't really comprehend what this illness is about, it gets you down nonetheless. I think our Charleston friends have forgotten about us completely, even after being there for 27 years.
It's just too difficult to deal with or try to understand someone with a chronic illness, and it is compounded when the illness itself is not well understood, and people wonder if you really are as sick as you claim to be. Yes, I've heard the talk, some of it has come from my own family members. Oh well, until you know someone personally and seen them struggle with the severe limitations, it's easy to shrug off. One thing I wish people did understand is how much it means to get a card or a note from them from time to time. Of course, if you aren't convinced I'm really ill, then I guess writing a note may be an awkward thing for you to do!

I look for the things God has for me to delight in, such as the two owls, right across our road, calling to each other tonight. They will probably do that for a couple more weeks until they start a family in January. I wonder if they will nest around here.

And I received some very nice postcards today, which always cheers me up. It says someone, at a brief moment in time, was thinking about me as they wrote the card. Always nice!

Well, it's almost 12 midnight and I guess I will try once again to go to sleep.

Come see my latest postcards I've received on Postcards Buffet!


  1. I love you, mom! it's really brave of you to share your thoughts and feelings. I think it is fabulous that you are able to brighten other peoples' days with your postcards, even though I know you feel forgotten and alone sometimes. I can barely handle feeling sick for a couple days... all the things God has taught you through this and the heart He has given you and your patience throughout all of this are an inspiration to me.

  2. I wonder sometimes how people would react if they had someones pain for a day.
    My arthritis is severe,painful and somedays are just rotten!
    But if you don't know pain it's difficult for others to understand. I certainly understand what your saying and I think we just have to cope as well as we can since we have no other choice.
    Hope you have better days ahead.

  3. I totally feel your pain. Not a good week here either. It is really great to have you share what you are going through. If we don't let others know, then they won't know how to help....if they even want to help. I feel totally isolated to, from church and everyone. Seems like the only reason I can fathom that the Lord has us in this season of our lives, is because He wants just us and Him for awhile. But since His thoughts are so much higher than mine, I am just guessing. You have been an awesome inspiration for me and I love you bunches!!!


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